Giant Ear, Part II

I'm f***ing surrounded by drama queens.

I'm not sure what I'm doing to invite this (other than simply being there), but I'd better stop whatever the hell it is.

Yesterday morning a coworker went off on me when I half-jokingly said 'why does anyone need to leave early?' when it was discovered we quite by accident had an extra person on staff for an hour. This opportunistic coworker inexplicably went through the formality of asking me if I wanted to leave early (no, I didn't). WTF? Why, when it was obvious she had already planned on using the situation to make an early escape from work? (Um, this person has sort of a reputation.) 'Well Kathy, *I* have a LOT to do, mumble mumble, bitch, mumble, bitch, mumble, thank you very much...' I wanted to say, 'Don't let the door hit your ass while you're flying your broom out the door.' But I said, 'Go! I'm not telling you you have to stay.' Real slick comeback, I know. I'm simply legendary for them. But it was all rather infuriating because we were all getting bombed with work at the time.

Okay, the other one: she and I are buddies. I really like her. I've missed her after a four year separation. She works for the same hospital but at a different campus, but she's briefly back in the Big House to help cover staffing shortages. So we're still in the catching up stage. But after several hours of hearing how she has had no time for scrapbooking, cooking, gardening or pretty much any of the things she used to love doing since the birth of her son four years ago... I was pretty clueless on what to say. Other than 'You NEED to take time for yourself!!' Gee, I know other mothers who would go insane if they didn't. So, *HELLO!!!* they do. Other highlights of her top-of-her-voice venting: How she has to cut/blend her husband's food because he refuses to wear his dentures because they're uncomfortable and has simply elected to gum his daily sustenance; in-law conflicts; the whiny, crying misbehavior of her son; a grocery list of the trials and tribulations of her usual work duties; a grocery list of the trials and tribulations of how things are falling apart at the other campus because she's not doing her usual work duties; and this, the topper: that her son was the biggest mistake of her life.

What elite strata of drama queen does one have to be to say a thing like that?

And then, what does one say in return?

Myself, I was tempted to say, no your biggest mistake was marrying your lazy ass lump of a husband. But on reflection, that probably wouldn't be appropriate. So instead, I and the other coworker who were treated to this bit of um, angst made comforting noises to her.

Good grief, I'm so thankful tonight I work with good old Bob. Right about now I'd welcome one of his lengthy detailed lectures describing his latest woodworking project. It would be sweet relief.