Bad Dreams

"Look Ma, No Hands!"

Last week, I dreamed Tim and I went into a large meat shop. Lots of counters and cases. Lots of variety and specialty items. And it was a family run business. All the sons were involved, and they really looked alike. You could really tell they were related, I remember thinking, as three of them stood together behind a counter. Very similar noses, mouths, the way they wore their baseball caps.

Nearly all of them had no hands.

A couple of them had misshapen stumps. But most of them had a razor clean cut at the wrist. So flat one guy could rest it on the countertop. Every one of them was oblivious to their condition and functioning normally.

I woke up before we had actually purchased anything.

"Let Us Pray(for HELP!!)"

Sunday night I dreamed I was in church. And instead of the pastor preaching the sermon, it was suddenly going to be...ME! Like every once in a while, they just pointed a finger at a lay person and said, come on, you give it a go this morning.

What was my sermon supposed to be about? I had no idea. I thought maybe I could just ramble and ad lib or just talk for 20 solid minutes about how nervous I was, clutching my pen for dear life.

First of all, I had to get through all the liturgy. Luckily someone else got up and went to the front of the church to read the Gospel. But when I thought it was supposed to be time for a prayer, my squeaky little 'Let us pray' got completely lost in the first chord of a song by the choir. All these years in church, and I had no clue whatsoever as the order of the service. Clearly I had NOT been paying attention.

In the next few minutes, the church somehow got bigger and bigger and bigger. I found myself standing on a huge balcony overlooking the pews, trying to find a gap to stand between all these overstuffed sofas filled with congregation members. Behind me, there were cafe tables in the alcoves, like in a restaurant. Below, between the ranks of pews, was a begowned and begloved Queen Elizabeth lookalike directing a choir.

And I was supposed to speak to (or even get the attention of) all this??

Luckily I woke up before it was actually time for the sermon.