Bradshaw International 'Pro-Fresh-ional' Parchment Paper

Do not, even if you desperately need parchment paper right now, ever buy this brand. You'll see it at Target stores.

Instead, go get yourself some sheets of 8X11 inch printer paper. You'll probably come out much farther ahead.

This is the press release photo of the criminal, post execution, in the driveway:




Never have I seen a product so thoroughly weld itself to baked products like this shit. Tim and I will be getting a little extra ummm, roughage in our diets, thanks to the fact that it's pretty much an integral part of the pizzas I baked Thursday. The final straw was the ruination of my biscuits I needed for a sour cherry cobbler Sunday morning. The bottoms stuck so completely to the paper they would not budge without ripping. What else was a time-pressed perimenopausal woman supposed to do? Throw a tantrum, of course. Smite the offender. And then blog.

Tim even went so far as to find an 800 phone number for Bradshaw International Products and record a complaint. I suppose that was the mature, adult thing to do.